Wow! Now I get questions all the time but this recent one blew my mind! A sister wanted to know if it’s okay for her to use sex toys to fulfill the sexual side of herself. She stated that she doesn’t want to sneak around having sex so this way she is having safe sex and not fornicating with anyone else. She said she was too ashamed to ask her Pastor and wouldn’t dare bring it up to her First Lady. Is this a sin she asked? Now I know ya face dropped so pick it up now! Let’s be real for a minute (So many of you are fake so I know that’s a lot to ask). Smile. Do you know other women that have and use sex toys? I know your not bold enough to confess it yourself. I’ve heard of alot of women using sex toys even those that are married and have boyfriends!! Yep…I said it.Now keep reading. The question here is is it a sin? Have one violated the law of God in the bible? This is going to get crazy but again I told you we’re in a new year so be bold about what you want to know. I know the’re going to be so many that will read this and drive right on by. Lol. That’s kool….but you gone learn today! Now if you aint scared…..talk to me!!!!
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jksspeaks.wordpress.com 
Single Christian women using toys…..it is a sin? I would have to say yes. Personally speaking, when I have used BOB (battery operated boyfriend) my mind was all over the place. I replayed situations, people and places in my mind just to get that right “one”. No matter who is was, where it was, and what we did I had to bring all that up again just to reach my destination. Therefore….lust and sexual sin was ever so present. When it was all over forgiveness (for me) was in order.
its a personal decision. I am a single woman and I dont have a ST nor have ever had one. I want to wait for the right man for that. I think to use a ST, you have to lust and fantasize and that is a sin. It s not godly in my heart, I feel.
EDIT: I want to wait for a man to have sext, not to have a ST, LOL. I have no desire to have one. God has equipped us with ALL we need to please or have enjoyment with our partners.
I personally don’t think so , because I, myself have a few. But I’m trying to remember if masturbation is a sin. I’m far from a preacher, 1st Lady, or prophetess , but I am a woman and in this world it’s sure the safest and “drama-less” way to please your sexually side. Saying that I guess if you look at it as “pleasing” your flesh, which it is , I would say it’s a sin
Toy’s hmmm… 🙂 …LOL …Ok i’m back! …Toys are not a sin it’s what we do with the toys, if using the toys to bring pleasure to oneself YES indeed its a SIN for we are 4filling the desire of lust and flesh…I too believed that it was safer but once I learned that masturbation was a sin, I had to use conviction as my stoper…I once held a VIP card to a pleasure store in my city,you name it I brought it, until i really paid close attention or sholud i say started being obedient to the word….that dreadful word masturbation and sin mix together put a stoper on the whole fix….I cancelled my VIP card and only when tempted did i do drive byes… thank God for delieverance!!!
Haha, I’m just a child, but with the eyes of the Holyspirit, lets look at what Ez 16:17 tells us
“You have also taken your beautiful jewelry from my gold and silver, which I had given you and made for yourself male images and played harlot with them”.
There God was condemning the acts of harlotry in Jerusalem and If he is unhappy about people “making male images” such as vibrators and dildos and “playing harlotry with them” which is one using them to please oneself, we can very well see that masturbaton alongside all its “tools” are an abomination unot God
Ok now this still doesn’t give the anwser to the question. Is it okay for a christian woman to have a sex toy? If you were now going to anwser the question what is all this here for?
Yeah, in my opinion this shouldn’t have been public, this is private stuff and it may in fact, encourage a young women to fill that tight little area with something realistic feeling, to fill her void and lose herself in pleasure.
I think you took this post in a wrong direction with something that should have been private.
It’s never a writers responsibility how a person takes a blog especially when it wasn’t my intention. On the Internet there are written a thousand ways to kill yourself. However your entitled to your opinion which even I value. Thank u much for your comment my friend!
We all have our opinions my friend. Just like your use of tight little area. I know it’s just words but to somebody else it could lead a different direction. thx for your comment.
I disagree. I think it’s very important to discuss the topic of female masturbation and sexual desire BECAUSE it’s taboo. Especially in the church. It’s socially expected for a boy or man to struggle with lust and self satisfaction, but just as many WOMEN who wrestle with the same issues are discouraged from even TALKING about it??? How are we supposed to seek help then? Wouldn’t it be ideal if a woman struggling with these “unfeminine” desires felt safe enough to turn to the CHURCH First to seek help???
I agree. Women (and yes, Godly women too) struggle with sexual temptation/dissatisfaction. It’s VERY important to talk about it, because the secrecy is what gets us in trouble. Satan wants us to remain isolated, doubtful and feeling ashamed of our weaknesses. This forum is – or should be – in fact, a private (we’re all incognito here) and safe (emotionally speaking) way for believers to shlare and strengthen one another. Thank you for your candid views, as we continue to seek God’s wisdom.
I want to know is it for a single save woman to find self pleasure ?
I too think it is better than fornication but I don’t get the thought that it is self gratification isn’t that what sex is too..please show. Neon the word
If using a sex toy is a sin , please tell me where do you find it in the Bible/
Previous comment by Just on Feb. 4, 2012
“…. Ez 16:17 tells us
“You have also taken your beautiful jewelry from my gold and silver, which I had given you and made for yourself male images and played harlot with them”.
There God was condemning the acts of harlotry in Jerusalem and If he is unhappy about people “making male images” such as vibrators and dildos and “playing harlotry with them” which is one using them to please oneself, we can very well see that masturbaton alongside all its “tools” are an abomination unto God”
To the person who keeps posting the verse from ezekial, your argument holds no ground because it says man not a body part. Are we to assume that everytime God refers to graven image of man is refuring to his body parts then what is it called when a man uses a graven image of a women’s part to help him. A graven image of man is anything that pertains to man-kind that WORSHIPS and puts man above God. If a woman uses something to helps relieve pressure that is between her an God an her concious. Jesus took sexual sin to a higher level, lusting in the mind after ect. As long as you don’t lust after ect in the mind I believe it is not sin. scratching an ich on your head is satisfing the flesh. Eating is satisfing the flesh. Using the potty can be at times satisfing the flesh.
How far is too far for unmarried Christian couples?? The biblical answer is very clear-cut and simple to understand: DO NOT FORNICATE!! – DON’T DO IT EVEN ONCE. The spiritual consequences are dire for any Christian who fornicates: If you lose your virginity outside of marriage you immediately lose your salvation and you can never get it back again, you will forever be a lost soul without God in your life and you and your fornicating partner will NEVER inherit the Kingdom of God.
Doing everything else short of having intercourse (fornication) is fine; mutual masturbation and oral sex is perfectly fine and are both non-sinful sexual activities to enjoy doing with your Christian partner before you marry. The Song of Solomon describes in vivid detail these two sexual activities occurring between two lovers BEFORE they are married, so if it is a sin to do mutual masturbation and/or oral pleasure to reach orgasm with your Christian lover before you are married then a vivid description of such sexual intimacy between two unmarried Christian lovers would not be in the bible, but DO NOT fornicate, not even just ONCE because if you do you have GONE TOO FAR beyond what God allows prior to marriage and you will then BOTH go to Hell with no forgiveness of committing this sin. It is very simple to understand this biblical teaching and there are plenty of verses to prove what I have just said is TRUE.
The following verses is God’s clear warning AGAINST committing fornication and what your spiritual consequences will be if you ever, even only just once, commit
The Unforgivable Sin of Fornication
This may be a very sensitive one for many single Christian men and women, especially if you have already committed the sin of fornication, even if you have only done it just once with one person. Due to the laxness of our society, and no one wanting any kind of God or moral absolutes telling them what they can and cannot do in this life, we have many people, including many Christians, who are engaging in the sin of fornication.
If there is one sin that many Christian people do not want to give up in this day and age because of the extreme sexual and physical pleasure that it brings along with it, it has to be the sin of fornication.
Many single Christians I have talked with over the years who were doing this with their steady partners all told me that since they were not married yet, they were hoping that God would cut them some “slack” in this area, he will forgive them or at least turn a blind eye to it, and allow them to at least have this one vice in their life since they had no idea how much longer it would be before they got married.
Other Christians, especially men, were literally chasing after many women, not just one steady partner, and they were having sex with whoever they could find at the time. Many professional Christian business men I had worked with were doing this on a regular basis. Some were married and some were not. But in either case, they were not willing to give up this sin even though they knew what the Bible had to say about it. They said their sexual desires were just too strong and they just flat out did not want to give up this particular sin for the Lord.
For every single Christian man and woman who is out there still committing this sin – the 50 million dollar question now becomes – will God cut you some slack on this sin and turn a blind eye to it due the laxness and permissiveness of our society – or does He mean exactly what He is saying in the Scripture verses I will give you below?
I think once you study the verses I will give you below, you will see that God is meaning exactly what He is saying in His Word on this topic, and He will not be turning a blind eye to this sin or cutting anyone any slack for wanting to stay in it. As you will see in some of these verses, God is using some very intense language to describe what He thinks of this sin and the consequences to the believer who commits the sin of fornication.
I will first start out by giving you the key verses from Scripture on this sin, and then point out and highlight some key statements God is making in these verses. I will then end this article with some commentary on this sin, as over the last 2-3 years we have received many interesting emails from people all over the world on this particular sin.
The Scripture Verses
Before I get into the actual Scripture verses, here are some basic definitions from some of the different Bible Dictionaries on exactly what this sin is in case you were not sure what the word “fornication” actually meant:
Sexual relationships outside the bonds of marriage
Unchastity, sexual immorality – refers to every kind of illegal sexual intercourse, that is, any intercourse except that between a husband and wife
Voluntary sexual intercourse of an unmarried person with someone of the opposite sex
As you can see from the definitions on what this word means, God has it set up that sexual intercourse can only be done between two married people in a heterosexual union. The act of sexual intercourse was never meant to be done outside the bonds of holy matrimony.
As Christians, not only must we love God, serve God, and follow His perfect plan and destiny for our lives, but we must also follow all of His ways for our lives. And the Bible is fully loaded with all of the ways of God so we know exactly what we can and cannot do in this life. And no matter how you try to slice and dice the issue of fornication, it is simply outside the will of God for our lives and will result in you losing your salvation, as you will clearly see below:
As you read these verses, you will see there is no way to spin or re-interpret these verses. Once again, they are all very straight forward and they all mean exactly what they are saying.
Here are 9 very good verses from our Bible on what God’s opinion really is on the subject of fornication:
“For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, false witness, blasphemies. These are the things which defile a man, but to eat with unwashed hands does not defile a man.” (Matthew 15:19-20)
“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.” (1 Corinthians 6:9)
“But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints; … For this you know, THAT NO FORNICATOR, unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, has ANY INHERITANCE in the kingdom of Christ and God.” (Ephesians 5: 3-5)
“Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, FORNICATION, uncleanness, licentiousness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.” (Galatians 5:19)
“Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a harlot? Certainly not! Or do you not know that he who is joined to a harlot is one body with her? For “The two,” He says, “shall become one flesh.” But he who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him. Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man (and women) does is outside the body, but he/she who commits sexual immorality sins against his/her own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.” (1 Corinthians 6:15-20)
“For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God … For God did not call us to uncleanness, but in holiness.” (1 Thessalonians 4:3-7)
“Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. Because of these things the wrath of God is coming upon the sons of disobedience, in which you also once walked when you lived in them.” ( Colossians 3: 5-7)
“… and lest, when I come again, my God will humble me among you, and I shall mourn for many who have sinned before and have not repented of the uncleanness, fornication, and licentiousness which they have practiced.” ( 2 Corinthians 12: 21)
“I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother (or sister), who is a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner – not even to eat with such a person.” ( 1 Corinthians 5: 9-11)
Notice the following key statements being made in these verses:
1. The very first verse is flat out telling you that fornication will “defile” a man. What exactly does the Bible mean when it says that this sin will defile a man? Here is the definition of the word “defile” from some of the different Bible Dictionaries and Commentaries:
Making the pure impure
To make ritually or unethically unclean
To make common
To render unholy, unclean
To make foul
To make filth or dirty, pollute
To corrupt, to violate the chastity of, deflower
The vices of the ungodly which contaminate a person in his intercourse with the world
As you can see from some of these definitions, the word “defile” is a very strong and intense word being used by the Lord to tell us exactly what the sin of fornication will do to all of us if we engage in it.
With this first verse telling us that the act of fornication will actually defile us, I find it hard to believe that God will want to cut us any slack on this sin and agree to turn a blind eye to it due to the permissiveness of our society, or due to the fact that every one else is doing it. The word “defile” is simply too strong of a word being used by the Lord, and I thus do not think He will agree to turn a blind eye to it like so many single Christians wrongly think He will do.
2. In the next three verses, God really turns up the heat where He lists the sin of fornication as one of the sins that will keep you from being able to enter into heaven. These three verses only talking about unbelievers, or is it also including Christians who engaged in this sin, even if only ONCE, before they die and cross over. With the way these three verses are being worded, fornication is obviously an extremely serious sin and offense against God and any Christian believer who fornicates will without any doubt lose their salvation and will never inherit (enter into) the kingdom of heaven.
3. The 5th verse above adds more to all of this when it tells us that not only are we sinning against God, but we are also sinning against our own bodies when we commit this sin. It then goes on to point out that our bodies are now the temple of the Holy Spirit and that when we do commit this sin, we are becoming one body and one flesh with the other person we are having sexual intercourse (fornicate) with.
The 6th verse then adds more to this when it tells us that God wants us to be sanctified in His site. He is calling all of us to holiness and He wants all of us to abstain from any kind of sexual immorality. He wants all of us to remain clean and pure.
The act of fornication will do just the opposite – it will make us unclean, unholy, and impure in the eyes of God, and that is not a place you want to be in with the Lord if you truly love Him and want to serve and follow Him in this life.
4. The very last verse I have listed above is one that really stunned me when I first read it. In this verse, the apostle Paul is telling us to basically shun our brothers who are operating in this sin. He is telling us that we should not even eat with them. You can also tell that he is talking about our Christian brothers AND sisters, not unbelievers, when he uses the word “brother.”
I know in this day and age, this would be a very hard command to obey, as we all know and have some single Christian friends who are fornicating with their steady partners. If you do know someone who attends your church who is a fornicator, then end that friendship immediately and never speak to him or her ever again. God’s instructions on this command are very simple to understand.
The only other thing I will say about this last verse is that if God is relaying this kind of intense message where He does not want us eating and associating with people who are fornicating, then you know this is a very serious sin and offense in His eyes, and that He does not want any of us engaging in it for any reason whatsoever.
When you put all of these verses together, one right after the other, there can be no doubt in anyone’s rational mind what God’s opinion really is on fornication. Once again, in a bolded numbered format, here are what the above verses are telling us in no uncertain terms.
The sin of fornication:
Will defile us and cause us to become unholy and unclean in the eyes of God
Will cause us to sin against both God and our own bodies
Will cause us to become one body and one flesh with the person we are fornicating with
Is one of the specific sins that will keep believers from being able to enter into heaven and the eternal loss of your salvation and judgment to go to Hell instead
And to top it all off – God will not want His own people associating with people who are engaging in this sin
As I said at the top of this article, many single Christians I have talked with who are or have been committing this sin are hoping that God will cut them some slack on this sin due to the fact that everyone else is doing it and that “God will forgive us” and our society has become so much more lax and permissive in its moral standards.
But if you believe the Bible is God’s true Word to all of us, there is simply no way you can sugarcoat the above verses. Not only are these verses all very straight forward, but once again, God is using some very intense and strong language in these verses. This intense and strong language being used by the Lord is His big “tell” to all of us as to what He really thinks of what will happen to a Christian who commits the sin of fornication and how serious it really is in His eyes and what the eternal spiritual consequences are going to be when the Christian fornicator faces his/her judgment day.
Thus any Christian who truly loves God and wants to serve and follow Him in this life and ensure they will enter into the Kingdom of Heaven will make certern to wait to have sexual intercourse until AFTER they get married.
Conclusion
As we all know, fornication brings with it extreme physical pleasure, and for many Christian couples who decide to enter into this sin before marriage, it is extremely hard and sometimes impossible to give up once you start to engage in it.
With all of the above Scripture verses being very clear on what God’s judgment is on any brother or sister who commits fornication, any Christian who truly loves God will be more than willing to NEVER enter into this unforgivable sin that will, on all of the scriptural evidence outlined above, will certainly result in God’s wrath and judgment falling upon those who commit this unforgivable sin, even if only doing it just ONCE. When the above verses are telling us that this specific sin will actually defile us and cause us to sin against both God and our own bodies, there is simply no other way or angle to look at this sin from. There thus can be no rational justification for any single Christian to ever enter into it. If you are now reading this and you already have, being a believer at the time you commit fornication, even if you only did it just the one time, then both you and your partner you have fornicated with are now both a lost soul with no hope of ever receiving your salvation and you will now NEVER inherit the Kingdom of Heaven which was immediately before you fornicated was yours to receive. I am sorry, but this is NOT an opinion, it is a biblical fact which the above verses irrefutably prove.
My brother Chris just recently married his Christian girlfriend. They dated for two years before they got married and they both made a pact and vow with both themselves and with God that they would not have sex until after they got married to make certern that they would never lose their salvation; they both knew when they started their relationship what God’s warning to them against fornication was in the above verses. To this day, they are both really glad that they refrained from fornication.. They feel God has blessed them as a result of doing this and nothing but good has come out of it as a result and they both know that their salvation is now secure.
Is your salvation secure? If you have ever at any time in the past fornicated (even if only just once) since you became a saved believer, then the answer to this question is clearly NO, you have both permanently and irreversibly lost your salvation forever and you can never get it back, no matter what forgiveness you pray for or good works and ministry you undertake at your Church.
God forgives sin if we ask Him for forgiveness with sincerity, there is no sin He won’t forgive.
Your right, whoever said there isnt a sin that the blood of Jesus Christ cant forgive!
If fornication is an unforgivable sin, why did Jesus save a prostitute? The ONLY unforgivable sin is blasphemy against god, suicide. When u commit suicide, you take your life away, and only God has the right to take life away. When you commit suicide, you are giving up the privilege to ask for forgiveness. God sent his only child to save us. I hope that god give understanding to this person who said fornication is unforgivable. Yes it’s a sin, yes it goes against god’s will, but it is not unforgivable if you truly are sorry
I completely agree with you!
Suicide isn’t the unforgivable sin. If you actually read in the Bible, the unforgivable sin is not being baptized by the water and blood. In that if you are not born of the water and of the blood, you accept Christ’s blessing but continue to nail Him into the cross. Please read into what it truly means to be born of the water (to be made pure; to have a clean conscience toward God) and of the blood (to Accept Him as the only acceptable sacrifice; sharing in His sufferings in this life).
Please read the parts of the Bible that actually refer to this. It says nothing of suicide being the unforgivable sin.
God sent his Only Son to shed his blood for us. He paid the price for our son. If we ask him to forgive us he will. I do not believe that you cannot be forgiven. If that’s true then why did God send Jesus to die on the cross to Save our Sins. We have to ask f for forgiveness for Sins known and not known 💜✝️
You need to get your facts straight. Jesus forgives you for your sins if you sincerely ask for it.
No. The only unforgivable sin in blasphemy against the Holy Spirit. If you have sex before marriage, this is no greater sin than lying, murder, greed, jealousy etc. Please give some biblical evidence that says that sex before marriage is unforgivable. Anyone who believes that their salvation is destroyed, please don’t despair. Your sins are already paid for. The price has already been paid. Go read Romans. Particularly chapters 6 and 7. It can get a bit tough at times, so if you’re struggling get a good commentary to read alongside it, and if you use an online bible service like biblegateway.com, then try the easy-to-read translation, or the Good News translation. You could perhaps read The Message translation as well, but please don’t only read that as it is not anything resembling a direct translation. It can be helpful to read alongside a better translation because it puts things in a different way.
If you are in any doubt, go read John chapter 3. Don’t just read 3:16, but read all of chapter 3. Read it as if you hadn’t heard 3:16 hundreds of times. Actually think about the words that you are reading and what Jesus is saying.
WOW i stopped reading when you said you can loose your salvation….wow ummm no you can’t.
thank you
Thanks! Some people lost their virginity through rape and molestation
Thanks! Some people lost their virginity through rape and/or child molestation.
Bye..you sound crazy
Sharon,
Please, go back to your Bible – the Word of God – for clarification. Do not be deceived by the devil and his condemning ways. Our God Almighty has indeed SECURED our salvation thru the blood of Jesus Christ on the cross. The ONLY true requirement for salvation is confession/repentance of our sins and the declaration that Jesus is our Lord and Savior. That’s it! No more, no less. Jesus took all our sins with Him upon His death. We, believers, are saved and set apart for God. He’s full of love and mercy, and His son Jesus is the proof of that. Many blessings to you, dear one.
To say a person who looses their virginity before marriage is doomed to hell and has no chance of salvation is not only unbiblical, it’s ludicrous and insane………………………as far as the other person quoted ” images of men “, you’re not even close to enterpreting that scripture in its proper context.
This is a very well thought out reply, however, I respond with one instance. What about when Jesus forgave the Harlot outside of the Jewish temple?
That is not just irresponsible – it’s wrong teaching and sad. Yes – I fornicated when I was a teenager- repented, studied the bible and got baptized and have been faithful for the past almost 20 years! Yes – yes I AM saved and I am heavenbound!
U r wrong! U cant lose ur salvation moron! And oral with ur partner before marrige is just as unholy…
I can’t help thinking that this is the kind of rant that an Atheist person usually spits up. I should know, I USED TO BE ONE! #TakesOneToKnowOne
I was only saved last year and since then I can say that just because a story about someone performing a sin is in the Bible, IT DOES NOT MEAN GOD ALLOWS IT!
ie. God did NOT allow Solomon to have 700 wives, he TOLERATED it. There is a big difference in definition between ALLOWING and TOLERATING. If this is unclear, I suggest you consult a Dictionary.
I’m going to pray for you.
Thank you so much for your awesome comment! Be blessed friend.
oh boy. U paint God as this terrible person. He sent his one and
only
son to die for our sins. We have a sinful nature. The only true perfect one is God. We can only try to do what is right. But man you forgot to mention about Jesus dying for our sins already. That debt is paid. Amen! My Lord
To add one other thought re Is it Ok for Christian girls to use sex toys such as a Dildo; Yes it is. Masturbation is NOT a sin. It is described in Song of Solomon. The passage in Ezekiel 16:17-18 is only referring and talking about the worshipping of false Gods and idols (Idolatry) and the use of male phallic objects made out of gold and silver is in the context of this entire passage only for idol worship, NOT female masturbation.
So to ALL Christian girls who enjoy masturbating with a dildo or vibrator; you can continue to enjoy doing so knowing that you are not committing any sin whatsoever. Just has taken this passage out of context and is falsely attempting to apply it to female masturbation.
If they lose their salvation from this they evidently didn’t have much Pancho! Thx for your comment homie.
As long as they are not lusting, or imagining having sex with another person, then it’s between you and god. It’s bad because it opens a door for the devil to come in, and push you to sin.
There can be no denying that the substitution and use of anything not provided by our creator is sinful or if used with impure and sinful thoughts or purpose is just the same as committing the sin with another. The bible is abundant with cautions of a humans misuse of their human brain to think and also act on thoughts or things for which are forbidden. And then there is that old “Caveat Emptor” of all time and that is if it occurs to you that what you are thinking or contemplating doing might be sinful that is your conscience (that little thing our creator provided us to protect us against free will) telling you that yes, you are entering the zone of sin and it is time to pray and repent and put those thoughts out of your mind. I am not talking of thoughts you would have normally with your spouse, I am speaking of things like using artificial things to achieve satisfaction or sex that is forbidden by our Lord. And do not act dumb on this subject ya’all know what I speak of.
Our Lord provides us very erotic poetry giving us an idea of what he thinks is good for and normal for us in Palms. Our Lord does want us to love in a righteous and Christian way, but that which is evil or hurtful or out of the bounds of loving sex is detestable to him and you can bet is sinful.
For all that which is a deviation from what our creator wants to do and be is sin and must be abstained from or avoided regardless of if we are displeased or denied gratification. We are supposed to trust in the creator and instead pray and seek that which is right and good. Only then can we be sure we will not be swayed by that which Satan would tempt us with.
Anyway that is this brothers view for what it is worth. Blessings to all and may your life be blessed with the love of the Lord and of someone special you can share your life with.
With Respect, James
Thx James.
Masturbation is not a sin if done in the confines of marriage with your thoughts concentrated towards your partner. For a single person? Yes. Lust has to be involved to achieve pleasure.
What about if there’s no lust but your body is horny and you can only be relieved after orgasm? Some of us are stuck in a sexless marriage where wife refuses to have sex. So is it sin if I masturbate to relieve myself without committing adultery? Hmmm, not easy .
You cannot lose you salvation. Romans 8:38
Salvation is a gift. You cannot receive it by works therefore you cannot lose it by works.
Doesn’t the bible say that god erases names out of the book of life? Why do you think that is? All I know is that it’s up to God wether to save you or not. Why? Because he’s God, and who are we to say why her/him and not me.
Here is the answer to any and every question ever; if what you are thinking and/or doing brings you closer to God, more power to you. Be wary of people/things/actions/words/thoughts that seem good but quietly and gently pull you away from God. Anything that obviously pulls you away is to be avoided.
If being a Christian and following god and being saved meant that you had to give up sex, ANY type of sex, oral, anal or solo, be it inside marriage or outside marriage, would you do it? How great is your love for God? He should always be #1
Yep. It’s ok to have toys…. or a shower massage, your fingers…. Most Christian women are too uptight to admit that they masturbate, but I have been known to enjoy a few screaming orgasms myself. Lighten up, ladies…. God isn’t going to put you into shell for having an orgasm all over your fingers, or a toy. But he will.send you there for lying!!! Oops, did I say that???
No. The price is already paid for your sin. Go read Romans. You don’t go to hell for lying. One lie and you lose your salvation? Naw.
Into hell (typo)
you will go to hell for ALL sin. It is amazing how people choose to put one sin down and seem to be ok with others. some choose to put masturbation and fornication aside, but still lie. WOW
So no one has an answer. Everybody is preaching but no one has a word! smh So how did YOU help this lady?
you are right! to me, I am also a single woman who believe in Jesus, I have the same question as this lady, I just asked myself about it, I think I don’t need it, I just need to make my life to be busy and peaceful and waiting for my right man.
I wish my answer can help this lady, I am a sinner, I hope I can be better with Jesus Christ’s help. and this lady is very brave to ask this question. Thank you:)
And why is it okay for married people to do it when they have the permission and body functions to do it on their own, but not a single person. This is so confusing, because you can have sexual thoughts and never use a toy. You can be looking at something simple as someone kissing and have a sexual thought, so that is so irrelevant to everyone saying yes you can just don’t think about anybody else. Or to be married and say think about your husband. If I have to wait to get married, why will a dildo or any sex toy will be needed, would that be on the level of have a threesome so to speak. I don’t know if a Christian can or not. For a course this will never be the topic of discussion in church. But everyone is saying everything, writing books, and still confusion is left. If the lady asked you James, what was your answer?
The Bible speaks of married couples, Hebrews 13:4, Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled… meaning, a husband and a wife can do WHATEVER they want in the bedroom where it be oral, sex toys, anal, etc. Its their choice, but not when you are not married.
Not James, Jonathan.
I think its fine. I just got one. If youve been sexually active you will naturally have a desire for intimacy. I fantasise about my ex husband.
a great man is not to hard to find, a great Christian man is. toys may have to be use to get a sister thru. The bible speaks on a man seed not being on the ground not female.
Notice what we are told in the Second Commandment:
Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image, or any likeness of any thing that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth: (Exodus 20:4)
“make, acquire, keep, use, prepare, work, execute, accomplish, fashion,” graven images are off-limits to children of God.
Graven Image or idol is not only something that one would physically bow down to. On the other hand, is very specific about His definition:
Lest ye corrupt yourselves, and make you a graven image, the similitude of any figure, the likeness of male or female, The likeness of any beast that is on the earth, the likeness of any winged fowl that flieth in the air, The likeness of any thing that creepeth on the ground, the likeness of any fish that is in the waters beneath the earth: (Deuteronomy 4:16-18)
God definition of a graven image in the above verses is not dependent on what a man does, or does not do, with that object. He makes no distinction between an object that is worshipped, and one that is not worshipped. These are simply Graven Images.
His definition is simply based on a clear explanation of being an image or likeness of a living creature, as given in general in the Exodus verse, and in greater detail in Deuteronomy, as we see above. The term ‘likeness’ narrows it down to a 3-dimensional object, since a 2-dimensional object bears no likeness to a 3-dimensional object.
Examples of these objects today are abundant, and can be in the form of art objects or figurines in the likeness of people, animals, or angels. They can likewise take the form of stuffed animals and other toys; and also brass eagles, carved birds, fish, horses, and other animals as found in homes and offices; and ceramic sun and moon objects, carved and cast statues, statuettes, African and other native masks, and many others.
Sharon;
You left an extremely long comment, but your views (although you are very passionate) are not in agreement with the word of God. This is your quote:
“Doing everything else short of having intercourse (fornication) is fine; mutual masturbation and oral sex is perfectly fine and are both non-sinful sexual activities to enjoy doing with your Christian partner before you marry. The Song of Solomon describes in vivid detail these two sexual activities occurring between two lovers BEFORE they are married, so if it is a sin to do mutual masturbation and/or oral pleasure to reach orgasm with your Christian lover before you are married then a vivid description of such sexual intimacy between two unmarried Christian lovers would not be in the bible, but DO NOT fornicate, not even just ONCE because if you do you have GONE TOO FAR beyond what God allows prior to marriage and you will then BOTH go to Hell with no forgiveness of committing this sin. It is very simple to understand this biblical teaching and there are plenty of verses to prove what I have just said is TRUE”
God does not endorse ANY sexual activity outside of marriage and when the scripture uses the word fornication it is describing illicit sex (illegal sex). If a unmarried couple engages in oral sex how is that not sex? Just because the penis is not in the vagina does not mean it is not a sex act, so how is it okay? You are still handling his sex organ and he yours. Don’t take the story in Song of Solomon out of context. God says; (through Paul) To the church Nevertheless to avoid fornication, (porneia) let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. [1 Corinthians7:1] [Parenthetic added}
Jesus spoke about committing adultery in a man’s heart is equal to committing it in reality suggesting and implying it is wrong. So to engage in oral sex and mutual masturbation is just as wrong as full blown intercourse if the partners are not married simply because you are committing sex in your heart. SIN IS A HEART ISSUE; Our bodies only act out what is in our heart, that is why Jesus taught so much about the heart issues.
Single people are to refrain from sexual pleasure both literally and mentally until God pairs them with a mate.
Also there is NO SCRIPTURE that declares you cannot be forgiven of a sexual sin. God has always forgiven the sins of saints. If he forgave us to be saved how much more will he continually forgive us. read James 5:15……”and if he hath committed sins, they shall be forgiven him”. I could say much more explaining the scripture on this issue, but I will be guilty of commenting too long as well. As pertaining to the original subject, No a single woman should not pleasure herself; such activity leads to sin. God will give you the grace to maintain as long as you rest in him.
God bless for now
Thank u for this I been praying on an answer to a recent question nd I cum across this. Im a sinner I got two kids in sin two different fathers been with multiple guys and the toys ask for forgiveness but still do it I try so hard not to but its hard to beat temptation does this mean god hates me can u help pray for me please thank u
Thank you for talking about this. I think this is a subject that the church has not given much guidance on or provided support for women. Young women in the modern day and age are left isolated, ashamed to discuss this or share with anyone the struggle because it is never discussed at church, home group, youth camp, etc. It is often spoken about as it relates to men and especially single men.
But we have a whole demographic of women- mature women and not virgin girls. The women who were either saved later on in life ( after they had already lost their virginity) or who were sinning (having pre-marital sex) until they received a revalation from God and were convicted of their ways.
So a woman like this who has had plenty of sex before, might have a healthy appetite for sex but be on a new path of obstinance from sex until she meets her husband. If that woman is anywhere over 30, it is likely that the search for the husband might take a while especially if the old habbits or relating to men through sexual intimacy need to be changed.
When we speak about sin with regard to sex- it is mostly referred to in the form of lust- desiring someone who is not your husband.There is a huge difference in the way women and men get turned on to have sex- men are very visual and get their stimulation from what they see and women are more sensual- get their stimulation from what they feel (the touch). So a mature woman who has sexual experience will be able to use sex toys without any need for lusting for someone. Sex toys for women are created as a functional tool as women do not require much visual stimulation but more physical stimulation.
So a mature previously sexually active woman who has a strong sexual desire but has decided to follow Gods way and wait for her husband- is it a sin for her to use sex toys without lusting to deal with her sexual frustration. Any woman who has had an active sexual life would agree that especially post 30s there are days of strong sexual frustration, moods swings, etc. due to the strong sexual desire. The option there then becomes- seeking out partners ( even if under the premise of just going out on a date with a search for intimacy- search for ‘touch’) or seeking out a tool that can help aleviate the frustration/tension without finding an out of wedlock partner. Of course there is always the 3rd option- Gods delivery from anything which He is absolutely able to do- but sometimes it does not come immediately.
I do not have an answer to this but I think that talking about it is important as this is I am sure a struggle for many (especially) mature women. And yes the times have changed- girls were married of almost at 13-15 in Bible times so the years of struggle that they would have had would have been significantly shorter and with a different bodily needs ( as our needs change with age).
I wish we had pastors, speakers and other wonderful people inspired by Holy Spirit speaking about this more to help guide women.
Wonderful comment. 60 and struggling with this as urges are still there! Got one threw it away. Got another, but still feel guilty after so must be wrong but so is overeating and being fat! God help!!
Jo thank you for this advice right here. I’m an older mature woman who is in her prime, but I’ve chosen to follow the Lord. I did a search cause of my struggles and this blog came up. And yes, no one wants to talk about it but it needs to be discussed. I appreciate all the comments on here although some are a little much. We need to be honest about this. There are not a lot of good Christian men out there any more. It is not good for ANYONE to be alone, but when that urge comes and if your coming from being in that worldly way into a Christian walk, it’s hard to NOT want to please the flesh cause the flesh is weak. Even if you have tried to hold it off, those feelings exist. I would rather please myself then dial and old friend, which I’ve rid myself of, since I’ve accepted Jesus as my savior. It’s hard out here as a single woman let alone a single Christian woman who has desires of that holding and touching, feelings. I would never want to go against my Lord God, but if that desire is there and it’s strong, and o give in, some here say I’ll loss my salvation, now isn’t that a irks harsh. Jesus knows how weak this flesh is he was in it, so I’m sure he will understand the weakness at the time. I don’t want to be with a man on that way till what God deams right fit me is with me. But I and others obviously, need to have some release.. So what is the final verdict on this issue?
if i may or still be allowed to comment
Im divorced and i have asked the same question . even though i have masturbated before after knowing Christ it changes that game. i now know the difference between sin and evil ….the alternative of being emotionally exposed u and your kids get hurt but going from relationship to relationship.
So im trying to get to the answer as well and yes churches dnt speak of this because its complexed ….
We are FLESH. i have 3 kids and divorced. Before knowing God i went from relationship to relationship to relationship….NO ONE is perfect……I rather have a toy and use it then going around creating soul ties with men i dont know or go back and forth with an abusive baby daddy just to meet those needs…Its a personal thing really. I am a woman of God i follow him but im transparent and i go to him and tell him God i am weak but i rather do this than go around from relationship to relationship and hurting my kids! Im waiting on God for the RIGHT man…Dont let a moment of loneliness make you get with the WRONG one…WAIT ON GOD…and do what you have to do to get by because last time i checked were are ALL in the flesh and the word is clear that we cant do anything on our own and that we would fall short thats why we need Jesus….We fall but he picks us up….And if one day it feels wrong and you stop doing it Amen Praise God but if you cant remember hos Grace is sufficient…I rather fall to that then get myself in the wrong relationship at the wrong time. I did just that! and had gruesome consequence. but God is good and lifted me up….NO ONE IS PERFECT. REMEMBER WE ARE ALL SINNERS THATS WHY WE NEED JESUS. I HOPE THIS HELPS YOU….AND KEEP THIS TO YOURSELF HONEY DONT TELL ANYONE..
.ONLY YOU AND GOD ALWAYS TAKE IT TO HIM..
Its a Personal thing. We are Flesh. we will ALWAYS commit sin REGARDLESS if were in church. we are weak and live in yhe world…thats why the word says when we fall he picks us up again…God knew you were going to fall short….before he calls u he know EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU. even the things thats havent came out of your mouth!!! and still chose you…..People might say hey thats a sin but they sin in other ways! NO ONE IS PERFECT….Im not applauding this or justifying this but if you cant hold it and you need to do it go for it…..Atleast your not going around sleeping with men creating soul ties….
My view is different from most people in that I believe that “all things are permissable yet not all things are expedient” – in other words, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ. As a divorcee, who has enjoyed the pleasure of intimacy and sexual satisfaction, it may well be expedient to have and use a ST, as an alternative to sexual repression, frustration or promiscuity. Remember that sin is already in the “lust” and that we all fall short and none is without sin, not one. We can choose to express our sexuality, which i believe is a gift from God, or repress it, live in denial and feel guilty or condemned about our natural urges anyway!
There are psychological and physiological benefits to masturbation which is why is it strongly recommended by doctors, to help promote physical and mental health and well-being. We are physical creatures with sexual urges and sexual satisfaction and fulfilment through masturbation is the most natural self soothing means we have to counter stress, tension, sadness and wide array of emotions from loneliness to frustration. We are then better equipped to deal with our circumstances and the challenges we fact as single mothers and women. This would never negate or replace the spiritual need or desire to hunger and thirst for the master Himself. His compassion for women extends beyond not just “throwing the first stone”, to highly valuing the woman who wept at His feet and poured out her perfume on Him, drying her tears with her hair. This is the most intimate and beautiful of stories about the freedom that Christ died to give us. We live in His mercy and grace and He is the ultimate friend of women everywhere. Jesus, our Lord and Saviour!
Why are ppl posting lije sexual desire is a sin and lust! tgats not true in all cases, the desire doesn’t just come after you get married its there all along, y? its the way God created you, however I do not believe that God is necessarily pleased with masturbation! Sexual desire is a natural feeling caused by hormones in some cases but the thing we need to do is know how to deal with it? The person asked the preacher who never answered but simply started a debate! What is the biblical answer, when you don’t have a spouse and these desires come up???
As im a single woman Catholic (21YD) and I don’t have a boyfriend but I do have sex toys but I don’t use that much cause I don’t want to disrespect god our father. But I been looking through all these comments but didn’t make sense to me.. is sex toy (dildo) a sin ? Or not a sin? I’ve been horny and didn’t wanna use the toy cause I don’t know if it a sin or not. Please answer my question. Yes or No.
I need answer to question, because I don’t understand why I refuse to be with a man. I’m in love with my toys and before I keep doing it. I need to know is it a sin.
if you want to be honest 90 percent or more of what christians do is a sin.watching tv can be a idol.having favorite singers is idol.being involved in worldly activitys.even to be involved in politics.as jesus said my kingdom is no part of this world.it also states not to be worldly or partakers of the worlds activitys.there are several things though not written in the bible.things that occur in our modern world.one such is the bible doesnt mention masturbation.as .i do know thethis may not have been an practice in bible times.niether does it mention blood tranfusion or organ transplant.yet there are those who consider it sin.paul mention that we have a conscous an if it condemn us it is sin.i do know in the final judgement jesus will seperate the goat from the sheep.they are judged by how they treat others.so i do feel how we treat others the most importan.no i consider oral sex or any sex before marrage a sin.yet we serve a big God who forgives an judges the heart.yet i always wonder why he gave us a urge we fight with?no not everyone can find a mate.what of cripples that still have the desire others do not want.the unattractive the fat?did they ask to be born as such?some people cant control wieght.no i dont feel God brings people together in this day an age.for he cant force people to love others.people have wills an God will never force others.i dont see why others so quick to judge.he with out sin cast the first stone.yet we all sin in word an deed.i dont say its right or wrong but if we feel guilty then yes it is sin.yet i wonder how will the retaded the mentally ill an yes insane be judged?there are some born with no concous an can kill with out guilt or sleep around an not feel guilty.in conclusion i feel the father we are from adam the weaker our genes get an the will people can have.
Um you never answered the question
the bible really doesnt cover it unless it is under the sin of fornication.which was a broad term at the time the bible was intipited an wrote.i do belive we have Gods natural law wrote in our heart.so as paul says if it bothers us it is sin.or as a minister said would you do it in jesus pressence.
Look up 1 kings ch 15 and why the queen was put away and in the book of Ezra on foreign wives and what baal worship is .the ashrea poll may not be spelled rightl papers the Greek God of the garden and I let you make your own decision
I don’t think that it is a sin. Nor should it be considered one, especially if you are single. I think sex is healthy and being able to explore the pleasure your body can bring you safely and by yourself is nothing to be ashamed of. True you will have maybe “bad thoughts” as you do it. But is not harming anybody, you are not getting an STD, you are doing something that releases stress and also allows your mind to focus in something else. And possibly when you decide to settle down with someone that initial seduak tension built up won’t cloud your judgment because you can get to know someone without having the drive to become sexually involved with them from the get go. I think having a toy is healthy because it will teach you a lot about yourself and what you like and don’t like, as well. It is counterproductive to feel ashamed. God is not judging you for this and you will not go to hell. Why? Because you are simply not being promiscuous by exploring your body on your own.
I’m married for the past 35 years.sex stopped after 5 years. A very sexy woman that I am. Love the pleasure of love maki ng. Husband on the other hand is not . Always freak by the thought but love looking at sex movies and magazines alone .He’s not compassionate, nor caring, doesn’t seem to love at all. So result to a sex you you stay loyal.Plesse help me out so lonely
You have to ask yourself one question. How would you feel about men getting a latex or tpe rubber doll modeled after a woman or creature from fantasy literature? If you feel that men having sex dolls would be immoral, then having the sexual appendage only version of a male sex doll would be equally immoral. Meaning that if it’s not okay for men, it’s also not okay for females.
Ezekiel 16:15-17
I am a single mother of 1 and I have a sex toy it keeps my physical side in check without fornicating and opening myself up to soul ties. I feel bad about it because the bible speaks of sexual sins and this maybe one because I know where my mind goes during that time🤔 but I feel like it is still better than linking spiritually with another person. Cutting off cold turkey is the sure way for me to stumble.
Is it a sin to use a vibrator as a Christian single woman without a man?
My answer to the question is it depends. The biggest issue with masturbation is lust; however, keep in mind both men and women can masturbate without lusting after someone. This is true especially for women. A woman doesn’t need visualization to masturbate.
Masturbation relieves sexual desire and sexual desire is something God created. Virgins, those who have engaged in pre-marital sex, divorcees, widows all experience sexual desire. If you are relieving that sexual desire through masturbation without lusting because you are unmarried, then I don’t see anything wrong with it.
I’ve seen some individuals make irrational decisions because they have a pinned up sexual desire they need to itch (i.e. marrying the wrong person). We live at a time now where individuals are getting married at a later age and it is harder to find equally yoke Christians to marry. God has always adapted to how the world changes. For instance, Adam and EVE were vegetarian in the garden of eden; however, once they left, they were permitted to eat meat.
Keep in mind, in the bible though, that Pornography is wrong because it is lusting after someone and it turns sexual intercourse into a meaningless action rather than what God intended it to be. Masturbation should be done in moderation as in everything else. The minute you feel that it is taking over your life, then perhaps it is an activity you shouldn’t engage in. Keeping your self busy will reduce the amount of time you may feel sexually frustrated.
At the end of the day, speak with God about masturbation and let him/holy spirit convict you as it is something that is not black and white.
I’m a single divorcee I won’t to know is it wrong to use a sex toy to fulfill my sexual desires. I have been tortured with this question for years and haven’t gotten an answer yet. It seem like the church world don’t won’t to touch on this question. I have prayed to GOD on this subject for a few years and haven’t gotten an answer, so what is your answer to this question.
I have prayed for years for God to send me a husband because I’m burning with passion but nope nothing. I prayed and fasted and all! So idk what to do because it’s been 10 years of wanting this and I just can’t take it anymore. Meanwhile my friends didn’t save themselves and one even cheats on her husband but she blessed with a loving husband and baby on the way. It’s so discouraging. So imma buy this dildo because if not I might end up having sex with someone since God won’t fulfill this desire. I want marriage for more than sex of course but let’s be real sex is part of a marriage. If I can’t get the marriage part I at least need to be satisfied sexually. The passion is very real!
Praying for you my sister. God is able. Sometimes when a small door opens the devil kicks it open. For you I am praying!
We are sensual being god saved is whole we were yet sinners. One person’s sexual drive maybe stronger than another’s does that make the one with a stronger sex drive wrong. I think not I will say two people having sex that are not married is definitely a clear cut sin though on the same arena sex toys are not humans and really cross no scriptorial boundaries it is impossible not to think about sex so that has no one size fits all categorie